A Day in August
by Soda.Holic
Summary: An accident. A letter. A chance to start over. "Ultimately, choosing means to give up one choice over the other, and along side it,all the possibilities that come with it"
1. Preview

**A Day in August**

In all my life, never have I cursed the sky for being so clear, or the birds for cheerily chirping away without a care up on their nests, or the whole world in particular for moving like any other day, unmindful of any single person.

Of course, to the world, it was just another normal Monday. To the world, I was just another ungrateful parasite with no right to feel spiteful.

A colossal silence fell over us as we watched her coffin being lowered down the pit. The varnish mockingly reflecting the sun blinding me for a second before it hit the dirt with a very anti-climactic clunk.

In small groups people took turns offering flowers, all white and in singles. No one bothered to bring a bouquet.

Today. My unspoken love will be buried six feet under. Covered by the earth, never to be spoken of again.

"Shizuru-san don't you have something for her?" Mai asked in a whisper as a couple more of the guests return to their places.

Between my finger tips I regained consciousness of it. A small white envelope I was holding on to since this morning, something I unintentionally brought along in my coat pocket but refused to let go of.

I took a breath and in my mind, re-read the letter to make sure I still remember.

Word for word I still do. And I'll probably always will.

I gave a small nod and neared the depression.

"To the girl I love, My dearest Natsuki"

I gently tossed my letter along the flora.

_"In this letter, I hope you find, even a fraction of my heart that I believe had broken since the day I met you"_

"Another young life lost..." the priest began.

_"To tell you the truth, being with you has given me both great joy and sorrow I'd always treasure more than anything"_

"It was a tragic accident that could have been avoided..."

The wind blew pushing the clouds further away from the sun, its brilliance, both bright and scorching.

Two men in dark suits began to shovel soil onto the pit, slowly, but surely, covering all that remained of Natsuki.

"Her final moments were spent in the presence of strangers, on a night bus headed for Tokyo"

_"Please believe that... On that day, when I told you I couldn't stay by your side anymore"_

"At 9:40 at an elliptical road..."

_"I was never planning to abandon you, or your trust I worked so hard to earn, but... "_

"A night full of loses, without one single person to blame"

_"To keep it. The day you were in the infirmary... you knew didn't you?"_

"In time, though the pain can never entirely be erased, those who loved, and were loved by this young woman will learn to live with that pain"

_"That time, when I ran out, only able to say 'I'm sorry' for what felt like a hundred times..."_

"Life is collateral, with death as final settlement"

Midway through mentally reading my own letter I faltered.

"It is too short to live full of regrets"

A heavy weight pressed down against my heart, and in a nervous jerk I looked up.

For a while now...it felt like the priest's words we're a sermon directed at me.

"But in the mercy of God, sometimes... there are such things as second chances" He was looking my way, a calm, almost eerie smile ghosting his expression.

"But like all choices made."

The words I thought I could never forget... the letter I've written and revised so many times just to make it sound less desperate...

What were they again I wonder?

"In contrast, you sacrifice something else in return, sacrificing the possibilities of that choice alongside it"

Doesn't anyone else notice how strange this priest had been? Where is this going?

"You get one shot Fujino"

The letter.

The people.

The funeral.

Even Natsuki.

In a brilliant white, everything was consumed.

"Pi pi pi pi pi"

"DAG GARN IT! BUBUZUKE! SHUT YOUR ALARM OFF!"

I rose in a startled sitting position and grabbed the alarm to check the time and date.

"Haruka... what day is it?"

"What's this? First day jiggles or something? It's the opening ceremony and already you're putting me off"

I don't know what happened.

Or if it was all a dream (partially because my memories are a bit fragmented)

But still...

"It's jitters Haruka-han" I said in my most chirrupy voice, a wide smile on my face, and a name I vaguely remember floating about in my head.

"This time, I'm running full throttle and without reservations"


	2. A premonition, probably

**A Premonition, probably...**

* * *

Every moment is fleeting, in a similar fashion,impermanent.

To cherish and admire what is brief.

That is what cherry blossoms signify.

"Miss Kuga, we have arrived"

Material things, days and months, appearances, feelings, ability and skill, even the amount of hair on my head today as compared to yesterday, all of those things follow this general and natural rule.

"A boarding school, huh? He's really going out of his way just to get rid of me" I mused apathetically, scanning the surroundings with little interest.

"Please don't misunderstand, young miss, your admission here is by no means a product of personal feelings, simply, what sir believes is best" the family driver, Kaburagi, was a loyal man, I've learned long ago never to trust what he says.

Social relationships

If everything was as fleeting and as impermanent as these falling cherry blossoms, how come the fact that I am my father's daughter, and there for my uncle's niece never change?

"Whatever's for the best, right?" I tease with a fast fading smile.

"Yes, please do not forget"

..

..

"Something about running full truffle" Haruka huffed, her face, a curious mix of uncertainty and pure annoyance.

"Do you mean throttle, Haruka-chan? Her mousy friend quipped, already used to her verbal impairment.

Today was the opening ceremony. In Fuuka, It was only customary that in the distance that separated the high school building and the gym, idle chit chat and gossip were to be tossed and turned in the vacancy.

"That's what I said Yukino! Ughh! But never mind that, you think it's about the council elections? Think she's gonna run?"

Yukino could practically hear the apprehension drip, it wasn't best to poke at a sleeping tiger she thought.

"Hmm, probably, she's quite popular the last I checked, It would be an easy win!"

"THAT B*TCH!"

"What a foul mouthed tiger"

Yukino laughed, watching her friend rant on and on from a simple, baseless assumption.

"She's got a screw loose I'm telling you, this morning, after yelling all that self encouragement I heard her murmuring in the bathroom, she was grabbing names or something, anything starting with Na, It-"

"Ara, ara such a spicy conversation we're having aren't we? Mind if I join you?"

"Bu-bubuzuke!" Haruka sputtered.

Obviously, it was a conversation not meant for her to hear.

"Eavsdropping is rude I hope y-"

"Sure Fujino-san, to get you up to speed, right now we're discussing the probability of you being somewhat mentally ill"

It wasn't best to poke at a sleeping tiger, Yukino thought; but caution aside, no one goes to a zoo to watch animals sleep.

"Ara, ara, a theory by Dr Suzushiro I presume?"

"Tha-That's!-"

"Yes! And just before your arrival, she was listing the evidence, um... let's see..."

"YUKINO!"

"oh, you left off at 'anything with Na' Haruka"

Shizuru mused, the cogs clicking into place.

"Haruka-han, please refrain from listening in on me while I am using the bathroom. Such a perverted hobby is not fit for a lady, tsk tsk"

To this, Haruka said nothing; clearly busy trying to fight the blush away.

..

..

"NATSUKI!" It was a familiar voice. One I've already anticipated to hear before coming.

"MOTHER!" I exclaimed with the same amount of enthusiasm.

I turned to face her with a smile.

In an instant I was enveloped in a warm, familiar presence.

... A fuller presence I noted, I wasn't jealous... Stupid Mai...

"Jeez! Why didn't you tell me you were moving in today? I ran here half way through the opening ceremony, have you unpacked yet? The principal told me to come get you"

"Sorry, sorry, It's just... well... you know" I muttered.

Mai was my first and oldest friend, my best friend. It probably started when we were in kindergarten when she dropped her ice pop and I offered half of mine, I tried splitting it only to drop both.

We counted all the change in our pockets and bought one to share.

A silly memory I'll never admit remembering.

We'd always been together ever since, always that is, until she was admitted to Fuuka.

"Oh, yeah I read your letter...do you still?..." She trailed, unsure.

"Yeah, I guess I still do, but this is for the best"

I tried smiling to ease her a little; hopefully a convincing one.

"Don't grin like that! It looks like you've got PMS"

"SHUT UP!" I laughed throwing a pillow from my open suit case; she caught it before impact though and offered to help me get everything in place.

Apparently, Fuuka doesn't get a lot of transferees this late into the year, the principal, Mai tells me, was hoping I could introduce myself to everyone at the opening ceremony, and the faster I get things settled, the less of a scolding she gets.

I go by my own pace though, I told her...

..

..

"Tic, tock, tick, tock" A man in priest's robes mocked watching his hour glass empty over to the lower bulb.

"Only a matter of time now"

..

..

Na-ru...

There was still half an hour before the end of the opening ceremony, by this time; most of the student body's attentions have gone in all directions.

Na-mi...

Shizuru's was no exception.

She remembered dreaming, but couldn't recall it in detail.

Something so impressive perhaps, that she woke up with a start...

Like a premonition.

It was bugging her, and she knew that it would continue to bug her for the rest of the day until she figured one thing out.

There was a name...

She felt that was most important.

Na-ra...

Na-na...

Na-tsu..

Natsu? That was, to some extent, familiar...

Was it a dream about summer? Probably... but there was something else...

"Na..tsu.." She tested, hearing it spoken strung a chord in her, she was close...

"Natsuo?" she mused

"Natsumi?" It was a girl. Her heart was thudding, she was getting so very close.

"Natsu..."

"Na-na-na-NATSUKI KUGA!"

Her unfocused eyes dilated, her vision clearing after a moment.

It was at the right side of the stage, where she saw her.

She watched, a scene so completely familiar, it was like a strong case of dejavu

"I...It's a pleasure to meet you all, I hope we ge-get along" she stuttered, her rigid body language so telling of a nervousness Shizuru was sure she found cute another time ago.

"bow" the principal instructed.

"B-bow?" She asked in a confused whisper.

"Ah! Bow!" Natsuki vocalized, bending into a very deep bow.

"Na-tsu-kiiii" Mai exhaled, it wasn't lost on her how much Natsuki had an aversion with being the centre of attention. She had placed hope on the fact that Natsuki had grown a lot since the last time she stuttered and went rigid on stage.

It wasn't that unpleasant to see that her friend hasn't changed much though... it was actually quite a relief.

"Natsuki...Kuga... maybe it really was a foretelling dream" Shizuru muttered, her eyes never leaving the new student.

The girl tried to compose herself, tucking her silky black hair behind one ear, she tried to smile, it was a very awkward one.

Like a sudden flash of comprehension, Shizuru reminded herself of her new resolve.

This time, hesitating was not an option.

And "Ikezu!" that smile... was just too darn cute...

* * *

**Author:** I had always found a great deal of stress trying to read conversations between Haruka and Yukino, mostly because Yukino's character is a tad... um... plain and squeaky(?) probably? So I deliberately changed her into a devious little mouse, please don't hate me for it. Also, if my memory serves me right. Natsuki had always had stage fright in the few instances she was actually put out front and centre in the anime, I thought that part of her was interesting and before I knew it, turned it up by eleven... oh well! I'll try to keep the OCness to a minimal in the next chapter. Till then! To-ta-loo


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